Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Back to School :)

Yippy YaHOOOO! It's back to school time! I was wide awake at 6:30am excited to get Jake all decked out in his new school gear an brand spanking new kicks! He on the other hand...not so thrilled. Actually he was quite a bit nervous about meeting his new teacher. Little does he know, that his kinergarten teacher from last year was actually considered one of the MEAN ONES ~ and he adored her. So yeah, I think he'll be just fine.

Something new this year, we get to walk to school every morning. Something I haven't done since Dana was in 1st grade (which was about 9 yrs ago.) I really enjoyed the walk Jake however, not as much. But he'll get used to it in time. It's only about 8 blocks. So as we walked what is to be our daily route, we saw the pretty morning glory's awake and open. At least I think they were morning glory's- not sure. I snapped a pic anyway. hehe. We got to T**** Ave and met the friendly crossing guard. I let Jake know that she is a good stranger, and that she is there to cross him safely to the corner. He smiled an nodded. Then we came upon a corner home with a huge barking dog that could've easily been mistaken for a lion! I mean this thing was huge- but I think it's bark woke Jake up as he nearly jumped into my arms. So we decided to walk down B****** Street which is filled with adorable well kept cottages, the only block in our area that stands out. The twin homes have brick walkways with kept garden beds, stripe canvas covered patios etc. They are quite charming. We pass along our way a home giving away free tomatoes picked ripe from the owners garden. How sweet the gesture, something I'd probably do if I had an abundance of home grown vegies. Sadly you just can't trust people these days. So Jake says to me- Mom I really love these homes! I wish we lived here which was then followed by 15 minutes of how Dad is going to build him a tree house with a 30ft slide when we build our new house someday. All I could do was hope that happens for us while he's still little enough to enjoy it.

Finally we get to the corner of school and there's no crossing guard! Odd, it's the first day! Standing in line Jake is really nervous now. The girls are calling his name to gain his attention, but he's playing shy. I whisper in his ear- "you're a stud muffin!" and we giggle. Stephen invites Jake to stand in front of the line with him, but Jake is too nervous to even move. Then, the tears come!!! Oh NO!!! But we were doing so good! I told my little guy, "you got this!" I'll make a cheesey cheese cake for you for when you come home an suddenly, everything was good again. Hehe can't go wrong with food!
The walk home "alone" was even more enjoyable. The breeze was refreshing, the sound of birds chirping, and crickets still cricketing. I tried to stay in the moment- take it all in. I"M FREE!!! Hahaahaha I"M FREE!!! My excitement in knowing I'd have an entire day back to myself was like winning the LOTTERY! I'm even looking forward to making dinner! The idea of having a schedule back in place just tickles me pink! Now maybe I can tend to my own spiritual garden...in peace!

HERE'S SOMETHING I FOUND FUNNY
I read this on FaceBook today.

Misconception Number 1: Moms miss their kids when they go back to school
Seriously. I’ve had enough of you by now. Every morning with the “what are we going to do today, Mom?” is finally over. I’ve had looked at your face twenty-four seven for the last 77 days. It’s time to go learn something. No more asking me about the pool, when is the next snack or if you can stay up late and watch a movie. It’s over….You’re going back to Hogwarts and I get to have a life again. There is a Christmas morning for parents and it’s called “back to school”.
Misconception Number 2: Moms like to go school shopping.
Are you freaking kidding me? Why do I pay taxes?…so I can rack up a 200 dollar bill at Staples for crap that we have laying around my house in junk drawers. Why does it have to be new pencils? What’s wrong with the chewed up, broken strawberry shortcake pencils sitting in the bottom of the toy box for the last 6 months? And how many subject books can you possibly need? What happened to reading, writing and arithmetic. If they added a couple of things for parents to that list I wouldn’t mind so much….why not pencils, erasers and vodka …..or some Nyquil.
Misconception Number 3: Moms like back to school night.
Why must we do this every year? I got it already. You’re the teacher…I’m the parent. My kid is either going to be smart or dumb. If he gets a certain number or colored dot on his discipline chart, he can’t get a prize from the prize box. Pretty simple stuff. Listen, I’m pretty old school. If he doesn’t listen to you…you can throw something at him. I don’t care. But I got a lot of work to do at home and I’m paying a babysitter right now. Plus, I’m pretty sure you are going to assign some project on wigwams made by some Indian tribe I’ve never heard of, so I need to get home and start my research. So, I got it. We’re all here for the betterment of the kids. Blah Blah Blah. Can I leave now?
Misconception Number 4: Moms like school paperwork.
How many trees are you planning on killing to tell me the same stuff I had to pay a babysitter to listen to the other night? You know our name, where we live and our emergency phone numbers. He doesn’t have a nickname….call him “stinkbutt” for all I care. We don’t have any “special circumstances” that you need to know about. He lives in a home with two parents who may or may not like each other at any given time and they will fight. If that qualifies as a reason he can’t get his homework done on time then he won’t be able to function as an adult and have a real job so you may want to “educate” him on that life lesson.
Misconception Number 5: Moms like covering books in that annoying sticky paper.
What exactly will you be doing with these books that I have to cover them in a plastic laminate? Do you often teach in the rain? Or while the children are drinking soda and eating soup? Do you know how long that takes? Has any parent in the history of education been able to do it without any air bubbles in it? From now on I’m covering it the old way…brown paper bags. That way I can cover the books and pack their lunches at that same time. Who says moms can’t multitask?
PS. Please tell my son if he can’t find his lunch to look in his science book.

Misconception Number 6: Moms like helping you with your homework.
What? I am scared out of my mind. I’m pretty sure that I forgot everything I learned in fifth grade by the time I was in sixth grade. I have no idea what you are talking about most days. I don’t really know my 12 times tables, I read the cliff notes to all your summer reading and I don’t know how to conjugate anything but I do know that song “conjuction junction what’s your function” if that helps at all. And please don’t even say the words “new math” to me. What the heck was wrong the old one?
Misconception Number 7: Moms can’t wait to pack your lunch every day until we die.
I hate doing laundry. Making dinner every night is the bane of my existence, so making your lunch every day for an entire year, in terms of “mom fun”, lies somewhere between brushing plaque off the dogs teeth and scheduling my annual pap smear. Listen, as a child I hated what my mom packed me for lunch. But, like every kid before me, and every generation to come you will find a kid to trade with…I’m sure someone likes sardines.
Misconception Number 8: Moms love after school activities.
I don’t know who made up this idea of organized clubs and sports but they should be the ones in charge of carting your ass around. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not against all after school programs. I just wish they would offer it during hours that would work best for me so that dinner wasn’t at 8:30 at night followed by 4 hours of homework. Why not do it on the weekends and call it “after-hours activities” so mommy and daddy could actually go out one night and pretend that we have a life of our own. Don’t worry about us though I’m sure that me and “what’s his name” will be married a very long time.

Misconception Number 9: Moms don’t mind taking you to school if you miss the bus.
Your bus comes at 7:10 am….which means that you should be standing by the door at 7:05 am. Not eating breakfast , chasing the dog around the house or in the bathroom, asking me to check your homework while I’m taking a shower. Get it together! I don’t like running down the street in my jammies at 7:12 screaming “Please wait” or “If you stop I’ll show you my boobies.”
Misconception Number 10: Moms cry on your first day of school.
We do cry but they are tears of joy. I have done my job. I have successfully kept a human child alive for at least 5 years without doing any major damage. Motherhood is the hardest job in the world!! Sure, doctors save lives and CEO’s run million dollar businesses but…you teach a kid not to poop their pants and then you can say you’ve made the world a better place.”

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