I've been feeling FUNKY these past two days, moody, feeling sorry for myself blah blah (wahh wahhhhhh @s GeraRd would put it.) LOL. It's a human fault, and I'm an emotional female "Nuff said!" :D Blogging usually helps put my mind at ease, and certainly everyone who adds their two cents really help me also, so thanks everyone for caring.
I dove deep into some de-cluttering today, maybe to keep my mind busy, or maybe to symbolically shed the pounds of fluff. Anyhow, it kept me busy for most the day and well into the evening. I have parted with two very large bags of clothing and some bedding, and decor I'll never use again. I even parted with a few pair of shoes. "OH MY!" The clothing was just a painful reminder of my once size 4 that I'll never again fit into. Plus I gave up alot of things I NEVER WANT TO SEE MYSELF IN AGAIN. And alot of the smaller tops that will more than likely not be in style by the time I lose this weight. YES you heard me!!! WHEN I LOSE THIS WEIGHT! You see, once I preoccupied myself, my mind found peace. Gave myself a break from the harsh criticism I've been beating myself down with lately. " It is within a peaceful mind that creativity is born, and there you can find all the answers to your problems." (from the spiritual film Conversations with God)
My answer came to me after sitting down to watch this film tonight. It is a film about an author, his trials in life, and finding the answers to life through his conversations with God. Check it out on netflix sometime when ya have nothing to watch and see what I'm talking about :) Ok back to my answer.....
Love is the answer- it is the bottom line (in everything) So I asked myself, "what would love do now?" Love want's me to be happy. And losing half my size (at least) would make me happy. Since Im the only one who can make me happy, I must act on my own behalf.. LOL Still following me? Since my old exercise routines haven't stuck, I must try the only option left.... I need to have an early morning workout!!! I must get the workout in, before I get tired and go back for my early morning nap. IT'S GOT TO WORK! It's the only thing I havent tried yet.
My Logic: I'm up at 7:15am everyday to get Jake off to school. Instead of going back to bed at 8am, I'll go to the gym and get in a good hour or two. Then, hopefully I'll be energized enough to get through the day without a nap and get more accomplished day to day, thus being tired by a normal hour and rest peacefully until I get to start all over again at 7:15! I've got nothing going on that early in the mornings anyway- so nothing can ruin it. Then hopefully by the time the kids are finished school for the summer, I'll already be used to it and stick with it. Sounds like a plan. It's my last and only hope. Never in a million years had I thought I'd be giving up my sleep to exercize....but sleeping is NOT making me skinny. So exercize WINS! So wish me luck!!! It helps when I know you're routing for me :)
Do not feel abandoned, I will not and cannot leave you. Call on me wherever or whenever when you feel seperated from the peace that I am. I will be there! (Conversations with God)
I hope it's okay for me to give you some advice...well what I am about to say just worked better for my weight loss. And maybe many will disagree but here goes.........
ReplyDeleteI kept failing at excercising for weight loss. I tried over and over and no results. So of course that made me feel worse. I have to see results in order to keep going. I think you might feel the same way??? Anyway, if you can put that aside until you see the scale change a bit you can get back to that. How? Change your eating habits first! Write you food for a whole week and look at your caloric intake and make changes from there. Once you see pounds coming off from healthy eating you WILL WANT TO WORK OUT!!!! I would love to meet up with you and help you with this. Seriously, let me know if you would like to get together. Even if we meet up at a park with the kids or maybe meet for lunch. I really feel for you and would love to help get you started.
I have to agree with Kristen. Jason changed his eating habits and lost 40 lbs in a matter of months without exercising. We still had some junk food in the house, but it was all about portion control for him. I also stopped buying a lot of prepackaged foods and started trying to make everything from scratch. Those prepackaged foods are so full of sodium. Lots of fresh fruits and veggies - my wallet doesn't like me sometimes, but our bodies are thanking us.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure your thyroid isn't helping matters, but I know that if you set a goal for yourself, you'll be able to do it. I'll be your cheerleader whether you lose 1 lb or 50. GOOOOO AMY!!!! LOL!
Hey girls, I'm just seeing your comments now. It feels nice knowing I have such a good support team. Kristen, I'll try doing as you suggested and see what I come up with. Right now I've been snacking only on fat free waterice. only 90 cal per serving. Better then some of the crap I could be eating.
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